What is a shadow? A shadow can be a shade within clear boundaries. A shadow can be an imperfect imitation or copy. A shadow can be dominating and pervasive presence. Whatever a shadow may or may not be, it is something that everybody has. It can be behind you, it can be ahead of you, or even around you, but it is always with you.
A shadow is capable of outshining, overcoming, and consuming you as there is no way to avoid it. When it is behind you, you can feel its presence while it slowly gains on you. No matter how hard you try, the shadow is always gaining. It is always ready to overcome you and then throw you to the ground. Everything you put in: the effort, the intensity, and the heart, is just thrown away as if it was nothing. Just like if life were to taunt you, your shadow is there to taunt you. It acts as your motivation, to rise above and over come it, yet it is never reachable; no matter which way you turn, or how you try to combat it, it is untouchable.
Being under the shadows is a test of will: The will to fight, the will to hustle, and the will to keep going. To be overcome by it can be something devastating. To know that after everything you put in, the shadow is still one step ahead of you. When you change for the better, it changes for the worse. When you become stronger, it becomes stronger. When you finally feel like giving up, it never backs down. In between you and the light is your shadow. The light that brings you hope, and the light that gives you happiness, is blocked. You can see the light through the translucent body of your shadow, but that is as far as you can get. The shadow is always preventing you from what you really want. It makes you wonder whether or not if all this is worth it. Is it worth all this effort? Is it worth all this pain? Is it worth everything you give? If it is always going to be there to follow you, why even bother to escape it? Just why... is it always with you?
Either behind you, ahead of you, or surrounding you, your shadow is there. As long as there is light in your life, your shadow will always be illuminated. With the goodness of the light, the darkness of the shadow must be created. Only in pure darkness can the shadow be unlit, but that just leads to something completely worse. The state of bliss in where you think you are dreaming and the state of happiness inside that you're feeling is from the light in your life. If the light in your life can outshine the darkness, then you can rise above the shadow. The light reassures you and is there for you to feed off of to give you courage and perseverance. It can make you feel superhuman. That is what you need. Your shadow can be a dominating and pervasive presence but it can also be just an imperfect imitation of yourself. In the end, you decide on what your shadow is to you.
After all this, I may ask again, what is a shadow? Is it the darkened areas that results when light energy is blocked? Is it a copy of the original? Is it something existing in perception only? Whatever it may be, I can overcome it. The light in my life drives me. My weaknesses thrown away, the heart of mine is strong today, and I will rise above the shadow. It may have the upper hand but it will be me who is gaining; gaining on my shadow until I rise above it. Regardless of the difficult journey, I have to stand in what I believe in. To know that something you could have achieved was let go because you were scared of your shadow is unacceptable. To say to yourself, ''I gave up because I just could not muster up the courage and perseverance'' is something regrettable. It only makes your shadow stronger and it only makes you weaker. A shadow is whatever you think of it. I know my light. I know my shadow. I know I must and can rise above it. I know a shadow is within us all, but we all have that light in our lives to help us overcome it. So what is your shadow to you? Is your light strong enough? I feel mine is.
The light within your shadow. The shadow within your light.
-Patrick Zeng
18/10/2011